Know Ruthie Prasil? She keeps a super awesome blog and takes fantastic pictures! If you haven’t checked out the fairy wings and dinosaurs, you really should. Anyway, on her blog she recommended doing a Project 52. You chose a topic and a day of the week and you write about that topic every week on the same day. So to help me keep my resolution of writing at least once a week I thought doing a Project 52 would be a great, and fun, idea.
To go along with the theme of my blog I chose Motherhood. Each week I will post what motherhood is to me. Because as any mom knows it is many, many things. So, here we go…
52:1 Motherhood is…Constant Worry.
From the moment I saw those two pink lines I began to worry: what if I have a miscarriage? Will my baby be “normal”? Will I have to have an emergency c-section with a premature baby?
And from the moment my baby boy entered the world I was a worrier: is he breathing? Can he latch on correctly? No, really is he latching on right? How much does he need to eat? Is he breathing? Has he peed enough today? Has he pooped enough today? Is the poop supposed to be that color? Is. He. Breathing?
The moment my little one became sick for the first time my worrying went into overdrive: Do I need to take him to the doctor? Emergency room? Is this normal? Is he having an allergic reaction to something? Is this the first signs of some disease or disorder? Is my baby going to die?
Irrational worrying? Yes. But that’s what motherhood is. It’s a natural, maternal instinct: mothers are protectors. And with that role comes this constant worry that as protectors we’re not doing enough to keep our precious offspring safe. When you love someone that much it’s a very scary feeling because if anything were to happen to such a vital part of your life it has the ability to completely wreck you. So as mothers we worry. Constantly.